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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29732526">Too Much, Too Late</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/IllegalCerebral/pseuds/IllegalCerebral'>IllegalCerebral</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Marvel Cinematic Universe</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Cheating, F/M, Toxic Relationship, Unhappy Ending, Weddings, breaking up</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-02-27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-02-27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-15 20:21:17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>846</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29732526</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/IllegalCerebral/pseuds/IllegalCerebral</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>I’m the worst person in the world,” Jane thought to herself as she lay on the bed, the last rays of red-gold sun peeking through the curtains and casting a beam of light on the rumpled sheets.<br/>She wish she had hidden her wedding dress instead of laying it over the chair. It felt like a ghost sitting there in judgement as she waited for her heartbeat to slow, for the sheen of sweat to evaporate. While she waited for the evidence of her betrayal to disappear.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Jane Foster/Loki</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>8</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>24</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Too Much, Too Late</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>
  <b> I do not give permission for this story to be copied and reposted anywhere else </b>
</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><em>I’m the worst person in the world</em>,” Jane thought to herself as she lay on the bed, the last rays of red-gold sun peeking through the curtains and casting a beam of light on the rumpled sheets.</p><p>She wish she had hidden her wedding dress instead of laying it over the chair. It felt like a ghost sitting there in judgement as she waited for her heartbeat to slow, for the sheen of sweat to evaporate. While she waited for the evidence of her betrayal to disappear.</p><p>Loki was silently dressing, and Jane turned her head to watch his fingers deftly buttoning up his crisp white shirt. He must have felt her gaze on him because he turned, the echo of a smile on his lips.</p><p>“You should dress, people notice when the bride goes missing on the wedding day.”</p><p><em>What can’t you scream at me?</em> Jane wondered. <em>Why can’t you berate me for using you like this? For being selfish and weak?</em></p><p>“Jane please get dressed.”<br/><br/>Perhaps it was because Loki knew this was far worse for both of them: Jane living with this guilt and emptiness while he stood at the side with open arms, ready to give her whatever she needed and then left wanting when she ran back. Loki seemed to live in constant state of self-inflicted punishment, he was an expert at denial. Who wouldn’t be with Odin as a father?Jane didn’t want to think about how she had fallen into the same masochistic tendencies so easily after meeting him.</p><p>Grudgingly Jane sat up, leaving the warmth and safety of the bed behind. Loki was pretending not to stare as she stretched and then scanned the room for the godawful bridal underwear she’d been pressured into buying.</p><p>“You’ll need to help me with this contraption,” she sighed, earning a chuckle from Loki that made her heart skip. His hands were cool on her skin as he helped with the fiddly fastenings and Jane was tempted to brush them away, tear away the delicate garments and drag him back to bed. She wanted to feel oblivion again. Only Loki could touch her in such away that all the thoughts were drowned out by white noise and pleasure. But she didn’t, she let him help her and then press a soft kiss to her bare shoulder blade. Something cracked in her chest.</p><p>It wasn’t like the olden days were women had no choice but to get married. Jane could have said no to Thor. For the life of her she didn’t know why she hadn’t.</p><p>Jane loved him, but it wasn’t the kind of love she had expected for herself, a meeting minds and souls. Initially she had told herself that this was simply what growing up meant, putting away childish notions like romance and soulmates and stepping into the cold light of the real world. Relationships were compromises. They were hard work.</p><p>“Beautiful,” Loki announced as Jane pulled the dress back on and he helped her with the zip.</p><p>“Not the word I would use,” Jane said with a wobbly smile, gesturing at the bed. This whole thing was such a mess. From the moment Thor had introduced Jane to his brother she felt like she’d made one terrible decision after the other. They had so much more in common than she did with Thor. There was a passion there but also a darkness that Jane saw in herself.</p><p>“I would,” Loki took her chin between his thumb and forefinger and tilted her head so she was looking directly at him. Jane tried to swallow the lump in her throat but it was no use. Her eyes were watering too and in that moment Jane wanted nothing more than someone other than herself to blame for this whole thing.</p><p>“I shouldn’t have said yes,” she bit her lip.</p><p>“But you did,” Loki said evenly, “and this has to stop now.”</p><p>“I can’t-“</p><p>“You can.” There was the slightest tremor in Loki’s voice though his gaze was firm. “I’m leaving tomorrow and I’m ignoring all your calls and messages. If you want to find someone else then fine but I can’t do this anymore.”</p><p>Jane’s heart plummeted in her chest. Leaving? But he couldn’t leave, she needed him, she needed-</p><p><em>You monster</em>, Jane thought to herself, <em>this is no less than you deserve</em>.</p><p>“I’m so sorry,” she said instead. “For everything. I wish…I wish I’d been stronger…I wish.”</p><p>“I wish you’d loved me instead,” Loki whispered, kissing her firmly. Jane reached up, pulling him closer too her and tangling her fingers in his hair. If it was going o be the last time she wanted to savour every moment. All too soon Loki broke the kiss. “I’m heading back to party, if anyone asks I’ll say I saw you leaving to touch up your make up. You have a few minutes.” He didn’t wait for a reply before leaving.</p><p>“I did love you more,” Jane realised, her voice strange in the empty room.</p><p>She had messed everything up so badly.</p>
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